A journey of BEING A MAN

One day I am sitting with beads in my hands. My lips murmuring some words which are in close synchronization with my movement of hands on those beads. My grandson is sitting beside, deeply engrossed in his novel. Suddenly, rests his head on my lap and sighs “I wish someone had told me about being a man”.  My hands and lips took a pause from its sync.

Me: “Why? What happened?”

Grandson: “Everybody is telling me once in a while that be a man, be a man! But nobody is ready to tell me what takes to be a man. I wish someone had told me about being a man!”

Me: “OK. Don’t be sad. I will tell you what it takes to be a man. You must have read how God has created Woman with a touch of tenderness, a heart to carry heavy storms, and those slender shoulders carrying heaviest duties of all. In our society, we hear people talking to a young lady as “defining her duties and responsibilities in her near future, by vividly describing how it is way too difficult yet she has to handle”. It’s common to our ears. But, there are some unsaid truths which basically nobody out rightly discuss “Being a Man”. Being a man in today’s world is not easy as it may seem like. It’s quite underrated but life happens with them too, just like it happens with women.

  1. You too have a heart– You have the same power to feel your emotions the same way a woman does. But they are allowed to vent it out by all possible means while you, my dear, have to shut your lips, bear it within and don’t give a pinch of an idea to your near and dear ones as what you are going through! An artificial smile comes to the rescue.
  2. The power of not to cry- It’s so weird that if you cry you are being told: “don’t cry like a girl”. You have to face, to endure, to absorb everything around you irrespective of the fact you like it or not. Yes, many times you will feel like bursting out in order making your heart a little lighter. But you can’t do it because you are a MAN and men don’t cry!
  3. You will be judged at times very crudely. Just like a fish can spoil a pond, your category of humans can be criticized to the level best irrespective of the fact whether you were found guilty or not. So, be ready all the time for all possible harsh sayings associated with your community! And, you have to listen and endure it with a smile on your face.
  4. One day you will start a family. You will be slogging hard right since your youth days and your salary figure will decide the “mood” of the girl’s father whether to give her hands into your hands or not! Sad, but this is a harsh reality. Then come the needs and wishes of your wife, parents, and children. And you, my dear, have to be the last standing in the queue. It’s bliss as to watch your loved ones so happy but what makes you arrange such happiness, that story my friend will be known only to your heart. ALWAYS!
  5. Maybe you will turn out to be “the lucky one” where to save your friendship you have to sacrifice your love. The fear of losing one will boggle up your mind. But you, my dear, will turn out to be the “best man for her big day” rather than “best-man of her life”. Your emotions will be mere friendship to her while it may turn out to be the reasons behind your heartbeat!
  6. Yes, you will be grilled at times by the situations in order to cope up with the expectations of your loved ones. All will be speaking as what have you done and what not. Nobody will ask you how you have managed to get it done. And there will be somebody all the time that will remain unhappy with you. Because we can’t keep everybody around us happy and that your actions will define your priorities of life. This will break someone’s heart and will repair the other at the same time. And you my dear, you are answerable to all!
  7. You will fall at times in your life. But all the time you have to get up and challenge your situation with your will. Nobody will understand your situation. All will see just the outcome of your actions. Nobody will ask how you did it everybody will focus on what you did.

Alas!  It’s an irony. But I guess that’s what the world’s definition of BEING A MAN is. ”

21 thoughts on “A journey of BEING A MAN

  1. Great post. I absolutely agree with you. This irony is a nightmare to a large number of men. Thank you so much for writing this down. Again if a “man” is writing this it can be another “Be a Man” label for him. Respect you and your work. Wish you all the best… 😃

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Being true to oneself along with being kind and passionate is what would define a person. “Be a man” is a burden one would have to carry, if someone has to think about it. Rather, it would be better if we all, irrespective of men or women, be true to ourself and follow the basic principles we are taught to survive. 🙂

    Great post, btw. Well written. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

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